5 Embarrassingly Simple Steps to Lose Weight Using Garden Gnomes

It’s nearly impossible to find a person who doesn’t think about losing weight. Whether you want to lose those stubborn pounds or just drop a dress size, we can all agree that dieting and exercise are the best ways to do it. However, putting those things into action is much easier said than done as most people struggle with their motivation.

No need to worry, though. We have the perfect solution for anyone who’s looking to lose weight without having to do any work. All you need is a garden gnome, some soil and patience.

Just like that, your problem is solved! Let’s see how it works.

Step 1: Pick Your Gnome

The first thing you’ll need to do is find a garden gnome that you’ll be comfortable with. You can choose the one you like the most and make it your own.

Step 2: Provide It With a Home

Once you’ve got your gnome, place it in an area where there’s lots of sunlight and put some soil underneath it. Make sure to water your new friend every day. Also, you’ll most likely want to limit your contact with it as they’re known to be quite hostile towards humans.

Step 3: Watch It Grow

After a few days or weeks, you should notice that your little gnome friend has grown substantially in size and will soon need a new home. Make sure the place where you move him to has lots of soil and is safe from the rain.

Step 4: Harvest Your Prize

After a few months, your garden gnome will have grown considerably and you’ll be able to harvest it as a prize. It’s important that you do this once all risk of frost has passed as they’re known to explode if exposed to harsh cold.

Once you have your prize, make sure to remove the soil from it and place it in a special container. Keep this container around throughout your weight loss journey and you’ll soon see results!

Step 5: Lose Weight

Once you’ve harvested your garden gnome, it’s time to get started with the weight loss process. Place your friend in a bowl of water and weigh him down to make sure he stays submerged. The weight of the gnome will help you lose weight through the natural phenomenon of osmosis.

Repeat this step for three days until you see results, then repeat it everyday for three weeks or until you reach your desired weight. Remember to keep an eye on the gnomes throughout this process as they can prove dangerous in large numbers and in close proximity to humans.

Congratulations! You’ve lost weight so now you can stop caring about your garden gnomes.

We hope that these five easy steps have helped you reduce some of that stubborn weight and we’re sure that you’ll see results before long.